Sunday, February 12, 2012

This One's for the Girls

Dear Girls,

You might find this hard to believe, but not that long ago, I - a thirty-something mother of four who must seem to have fallen out of a completely different world from the fascinating one you inhabit-  I was one of you.  Don't let the yoga pants, unkempt hair, and watchful, maternal eye fool you.  I had my share of hopes and heartbreaks before living the dream.  (And yes, this is what your dreams will come to.  I am your future, dear girl, and underneath the clutter of toys and laundry, it is remarkably wonderful. Trust me on this one!)  To you, I may seem ancient and out of touch, but once I was young and much like you, full of fanciful dreams of romance and flowers and boys who write poems...  These are all well and good, of course, but time has taught me how much greater love is than a good show.

You are young, in your teens, maybe your early twenties.  You are full of hopes and dreams, and some of those hopes and dreams swirl around the image of Mr. Right.  He is smart, funny, handsome, and absolutely, positively, irremediably  in love with you.  In fact, he probably bears an uncanny resemblance to whatever young man has most recently captured your fancy...

Maybe you are convinced you have already met him.  Maybe you're right.  Maybe you're mistaken.  Maybe you're still waiting for him to sweep you off your feet.  Maybe you're tired of maybe...  So much uncertainty lives in the heart of a girl on the brink of full-blown adulthood.


One thing is certain.  Unless you are legally blind or completely clueless, you've noticed all the pink and red filling the shelves of every store you've entered in the last month.  It's that time of year again, when young girls dream of romance - (if they aren't too busy deriding the overt consumerism of the holiday, but that's another post...).  Maybe your Valentine's Day will involve a romantic meal with Maybe Mr. Right, followed by a movie or, better yet, a walk under the stars, all sights and sounds subdued by the overwhelming sensation of his hand in yours.  Ah, young love...  Enjoy your evening, my dear girl, but reserve at least a little of your heart.  I hate to be a pessimist in the season of love, but this guy, as perfect as he seems, might not be Definitely Mr. Right.  I hope, for the sake of young love, that he is, but the reality is that most girls experience at least a couple disappointments before realizing their dreams.  So share your heart, but use your head.  

For the rest of you girls...  I mean it with all of my heart when I say you are blessed - so long as you refuse to sit home and mope over the absence of Mr. Right.  You are free to grab your best girl friend and enjoy a night on the town.  You can go to Red Lobster or Taco Bell or anywhere your hearts desire.  You can make memories to cherish, long after time has delivered you into the arms of lasting love.  At your age, guys will come and go, and in years to come, you won't think much of any of them.  When you do, it will more than likely be with thanksgiving that God brought something far more precious your way.  

But your best girl friend, your bestie, your BFF if that's still en vogue, she you will always remember with wistful joy.  Sadly but truly, it is entirely possible that as life leads each of you down amazing, beautiful paths, your paths will at some point diverge.  You may end up miles and miles away from the keeper of your youthful dreams.  You might talk every day, rarely, or never. So if you have the chance now, live it up on Valentine's Day.  Laugh at your single status, call each other the best Valentines ever, and know that this is one Valentine's Day you will never wish you'd spent with someone else.  Years from now, when you are pleasantly settled with the man of your dreams and the perfect children you made together, you will look back on this Valentine's Day and wish you could relive it, just once... Because unlike whatever boy you might wish to notice you, your best girl friend will always hold an amazingly precious place in your heart, a place untainted by young love's disappointment, a place made sacred by the shared sorrows and joys of growing into womanhood.  

Cherish her.

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