"My child hates to read!" I've heard this from more than one person, but thankfully, lack of enthusiasm for books has not been a problem in our house. One of our children reads like his life depends upon it. He learned to read at an early age, with minimal instruction. Another often prefers playing to reading, but still loves a good story, whether he reads it to himself or snuggles up to listen to me read. He did not learn to read as easily as his brother. There were times we struggled through reading lessons, but the struggles were more a matter of interest and confidence, perhaps with a dose of boredom with our reading book. (It really was not a good fit). We survived the initial awkwardness, and he has become quite a good little reader and a great little story writer. Our home is, uh, blessed with his numerous literary endeavors. The youngest two are not literate yet, but one falls asleep with a stack of books at her feet. I think she's on her way to a lifelong love or reading. We'll see about the little one...
Our home is full of books, and my children are always eager to add more library books, as well as "books to keep," to the mayhem. So, when I hear of children who hate to read, the temptation arises to offer a bunch of tips. And I will, but first, a word to parents of unenthusiastic readers: It's okay. Yes, your child must learn to read. Literacy is not a luxury. Yes, you should encourage in your child a love of reading. Books open whole worlds to us, introducing us to new ideas and new people, strengthening, challenging and inspiring us to be better, more thoughtful human beings. But the reality is that even among adults, not everyone is an avid reader. Just as we have different levels of innate interest and ability in art, music, athletics, and a host of other pastimes, so we - and our children - have different levels of innate interest and ability in reading. And that is okay. Provided your child learns to read, he can live a pretty decent life without his nose stuck in a book all the time. He might be less prone to trip over cracks in the sidewalk if he isn't holding a book in front of his face or reviewing it in his mind. He might be more prone to gather and converse with other human beings, preferring live characters to those on the page. Yes, learning to love books will enrich his life, but not learning to love books will not end it. So don't despair. Your child may not be a hopeless bookworm, but he has a whole bunch of other sorts of awesome going for him. Teach him to read, encourage him to love books, and marvel at the person God has created him to be, whatever his interest in reading may be!
But I do have some reading tips, because while a love for books is sort of inborn, it's sort of not inborn. There are things parents can do to nurture this love, and since I want everyone to fall in love with books, I can't not offer a few tips. Some of them are no-brainers. I included them because a) it's good to be reminded of the basics, and b) if anyone without a brain stumbles across this post, these tips should be here for them. I hope, if you have an struggling or unenthusiastic reader, you will find something in this list to help you and your child. If not, please read the previous paragraph and then go paint or run around the yard or sing a song together or somehow enjoy the richness of whatever passions dance within your child's heart.
1. Read early. You cannot begin to read to your child too early. Start before they are old enough to reach out, grab the book, and gnaw on it. Continue through the grabby, chewy, drooly months. Don't give up during the can't sit still months (or years). With some young children, you'll find yourself reading around them rather than to them (or more accurately, reading with them circling around you and climbing over you and burrowing under you, etc). Don't wait for them to put on their listening ears and sit criss-cross applesauce. Make reading a part of their lives from the very beginning.
2. Read often. Read daily. Reading before bed or at established times during the day establishes a habit of reading. If you maintain a consistent reading time, they will come not only to endure, but to expect and want to read at that time. It becomes part of the routine. If you read before bed, it also becomes a delay tactic. "Mom, read to me! One more book... please?" The child who puts off reading all day long suddenly morphs into a bookworm when given the option of reading or sleeping. If you've planned for this, it won't be a bedtime battle. They think they're staying up late. You know it's part of your secret super-reader plan. Everyone wins. Whatever time or times you choose, be sure you read often enough for reading to be a habit.
3. Understand the difference between oral and silent reading ability. As your child is learning to read, understand that what she is able to decipher in her head may be beyond what she is able to recite aloud. When teaching reading, we tend to emphasize oral reading before transitioning to silent reading. We do this to ensure that the child is reading correctly. It is important to understand, in evaluating a child's reading ability, that oral reading requires more work than silent reading. Not only must a child get what is on the page into her brain and decipher its meaning, she must then extract the words from the tangles in her brain and get her mouth to spit them back out. That's a lot harder than just figuring out what those letters mean, and if you don't believe me, time yourself reading this paragraph silently and then aloud. Or observe the silence as everyone stares into their laps when the adult Sunday School teacher asks for volunteers to read a Bible verse or two. It's not that we can't read (I admit, I rarely volunteer to read aloud), but that reading out loud is a clumsy, complicated job (and I think my oral reading skills are at least decent). It's important to keep this in mind, especially if you are your child's primary reading teacher. It's quite possible that they are perfectly able to read the words on the page and understand what they mean, but not so skilled at reading aloud. You may have a better reader than you realize.
4. Provide opportunities for success. Because reading, especially oral reading, can be so difficult, be sure to provide opportunities for success. Sneak a few easy-peasy books in with the more challenging ones. Muddling through a task is no fun. Sailing through a task is a blast. Give your child the confidence-boosting joy of sailing through a book every now and then. He'll see how fun reading is and how good he is at reading, and he'll want to feel that way again. So he'll read again and again, and as he does so, his confidence and skill will increase.
5. Don't give up. Learning to read and learning to love to read take time. After struggling through reading lessons for several months, I put aside the book of structured reading lessons and just read to and with my second son - Bob books, Dr. Seuss books, chapter books, library books on any subject that interested him. He could read, but whether he could read skillfully and whether he would love books remained to be seen. Then one afternoon, completely out of the blue, he got his nose stuck in a Dennis the Menace comic book that was probably published before I was born. The book went with us to the grocery store and to the pizza place. I will remember that day as the day John became a full-fledged member of the reader's club. It wasn't something I or anyone else could rush. When he was ready, he did it. He found confidence and joy in reading. Don't give up. You never know when everything will click.
6. Keep reading. Someone once said the biggest mistake parents make is that we stop reading to our children. He recommended reading more advanced books to older children to challenge their precious minds to grow beyond their current limitations. I recommend it for more personal reasons. First, it will keep alive and healthy the reading relationship you developed in their younger years. You've been reading together for years. Why stop something wonderful just because they are able to read alone? Second, it will give you a special time with your older child. I don't read as much to Andrew as I used to, mainly because he'd rather read at his own lightening fast pace. But I do read to him, and only him, a couple times a week. (I read to all four of them, or to the older two and the younger two, more often than that). The time that we have with just the two of us is wonderful. His eyes light up with the one-on-one attention that this time allows us. Often, I'm reading pages from a book in which he's already read chapters, but content doesn't matter. Time together does.
7. Expand your horizons. Very important lesson: You might have to take a leap off of your comfort bookshelf. I grew up reading Little House on the Prairie, Ramona, The Secret Garden, Little Women, Anne of Green Gables, and the like. It didn't take me long to realize that with a house full of boys, I was going to have to learn a bit more about juvenile fiction. (I'm holding all those books and more in reserve for Elisabeth, and oh, what a glorious day it will be when we compare Jane Austen notes!). In the meantime, I have three boys whose tears over these books will be of a completely different passion than mine. Many of the books of my childhood just won't cut it for them. I've had to ask for recommendations on their behalf. I've had to feign interest in books that made me wince. (Really, you want to read THAT?) In the sometimes reluctant expanding of my horizons, though, I have discovered a few gems. I must thank my wise and wonderful sister for pointing me to two such gems, Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson series and Lloyd Alexander's Prydain Chronicles, both of which, she may be amused to read, required multiple recommendations. (See post on Raising Your Spirited Child). I hesitated to pick up the Percy Jackson series... Greek mythology? Eh... But the books turned out to be well written, thought provoking, faith strengthening, and just plain fun. The Prydain Chronicles are a sort of medieval fantasy, not a genre to which I am typically drawn. I didn't expect them to win a spot among my favorite all-time books, but that is just what they have done. I loved, loved, loved the five books of that series, so much so that I also read Lloyd Alexander's Westmark series and a few other solo books of his. I almost forgot... This post is supposed to be about our children reading... I hope my tangent proves the delights of expanding one's horizons. It opened wonderful worlds to me, worlds into which Andrew dove with as much enthusiasm as his mother did. We both enjoyed these books, and it has encouraged me to take a deeper interest in some of his choices, rather than raise an eyebrow at the cover as I tell him he may check it out of the library.
8. Read classic literature. Classics are classics for a reason. They have informed and inspired generation after generation of readers. Don't let your child miss out on all they have to offer - timeless characters, significant plots, complex themes - by assuming they are too boring, too hard, or too antiquated for your child to understand or enjoy. Check out the Children's Illustrated Classics and Great Illustrated Classics series at the library or Books-A-Million. These are abridged versions of the classics, with illustrations throughout, that will introduce your child to the Classics. The books are not as rich in language or literary devices as the originals, but they are a good introduction, hopefully good enough to inspire your child to read the originals, or at least to be less afraid when the Classics come up as assigned reading in high school.
9. Don't be afraid of poor writing. "I don't care what they're reading, as long as they're reading." I cringe a little when I hear this, because it does matter. What one reads influences how one thinks, speaks, and writes. We cannot expect to raise thoughtful, eloquent speakers and writers on diets of fragments, run-ons, and redundancy. There are books so poorly written they are painful to read, and so it pains me a little to offer this particular tip. But there is something in the idea that quality is not as important as the fact that a child is actually reading of his own accord. I think of Mary Pope Osborne's Magic Treehouse series. Mary Pope Osborne is close to a household name around here, and I've come to love her work and respect her gifts, but the first Magic Treehouse book that we read was bad. Really bad. I couldn't stand reading it. In the living room. To my children. It was full of completely inexplicable fragments that the teacher in me could not refrain from pointing out to my poor children with the utmost disapproval. But we read it and went on to read more of her books. My boys loved the series, and as we explored it more deeply, I had to admit that not all of the books were so bad. Some were written quite well for what they were, and most were full of tidbits of factual information that pleasantly reinforced our history and science lessons. Had I banned Magic Treehouse books on the basis of poor writing, we would have missed out on many fun, decently-written stories. At the least, poorly written books may serve as gateway books in that, while they are neither powerful nor inspiring themselves, they open to children a world of powerful, inspiring books by encouraging otherwise reluctant readers to enter the world of books.
10. Don't be afraid of new books and new series. Well-written Classics are great, but they aren't the only books in the world. New books come out every day, and some of them are great. Ask your librarian if you need help finding books or series your child will enjoy. (Benefit of series, if they enjoy the first book, they'll probably ask to read the second, and the third, and the fourth, and beg for the fifth).
11. Start a secret book club with your child. I don't mean secret passwords and covert meetings. I mean a book club so secret you are the only one who knows it exists. Read the books your child reads for school and for pleasure, then look for opportunities to discuss them. Explore the characters' internal and external struggles. Your child may have similar struggles now or in the future. Teach them to learn from characters' experiences. You don't have to do this over lemonade and cucumber sandwiches, though if it suits you and your child, by all means, do so. All you have to do is talk. While you're driving, eating dinner, washing dishes, tucking in, or whenever the opportunity presents itself, talk. "You know what I was thinking about? You know how in such-and-such a book, so-and-so does....? That's kind of like what happened with you today..." Keep it simple, keep it sincere.
You can also play games with them. Two games we like to play are "Guess That Character" and "Name Something from This Book." The first is like Twenty Questions. One person picks a character. The other asks questions till they discover the character's identity. "Name Something" is a game in which players take turns naming something - any detail big or small will do - from a particular book or series. The first person unable to think of something that hasn't already been mentioned is out. Two warnings about this game.
1. You may get so wrapped up in it that you miss your exit and have to drive an extra ten miles down the interstate.
2. You'll probably lose.
12. Model a love of reading. Plain and simple, let your kids see that you love reading. Let them see you checking books out of the library. Let them see your books lying around the house. Let them see you reading throughout the day. Let them see you eager to read a new book. Once in awhile, argue playfully with them about which of you will be the first to read the next book in a mutually enjoyed series. Enthusiasm is contagious.
I hope that if you made it all the way through this post, you have found something helpful or encouraging. If not, at least you had your daily reading time! (Remember, reading doesn't have to be all high quality classics!)
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