Conviction comes at the strangest of times. Brushing my teeth last night, thinking over the events of the day, I thought about how sometimes when my children misbehave I correct them with an clearly annunciated, "Unacceptable." Usually, this utterance comes in the chaos of getting four children ready and out the door or in the midst of some other activity requiring order and concentration, not my two strongest points. Of course, I do not mean that they are unacceptable, but that their behavior at that particular moment is unacceptable and must therefore change immediately. I trust they know and understand that truth, but nonetheless, conviction hit from two directions.
First came the realization that however much I might say a certain behavior is unacceptable, it sort of is acceptable. What I mean may be explained like this: Imagine the most annoying, frustrating, maddening person in your family, immediate or extended, that person you'd like to take aside and throttle till they come to their senses. Got it? Now, picture a family reunion five or ten years from now. Is that person present at your hypothetical gathering? Barring ex-spouses and extreme dysfunction, I'm betting that person is there, and everything is peachy. In truth, family accepts a lot of so-called unacceptable behavior.
Why? Because family is family, and you love them despite their flaws and stupidity. Familial love extends the sort of grace that bears the annoying, accepts the flawed, defends the weak, and wraps the sinner in unconditional love. Families do not shun their members, or at least they ought not do so. Instead, they suspend their personal feelings of disbelief, hurt, and frustration to enfold the black sheep in the warm, loving protection of the flock. Yes, there are times to be stern and unyielding, but for the most part - without ignoring or excusing bad behavior - a family accepts, defends, and is ever hopeful for its own.
Kind of like... slap of conviction number two... Jesus. I've been a Christian for nearly thirty years (yes, I'm old now), and while I've experienced plenty of conviction and correction, my Savior has never shunned me. Always, He has received me with love and gentleness. This is not because I am acceptable, but because, thanks to the cross, I am part of the family of God. When I am stupid, stubborn, or just plain sinful - in short, when I fall down - Jesus does not say, "Unacceptable." He does not say, "On your feet! Straighten up!" Rather, he suggests a better way. "No, no.. don't walk that way. Walk this way." And his Spirit provides the courage to stand and the grace to walk in Christ's better way.
I'm sure, being thick of head, I will again tell at least one of my children, "Unacceptable," but I hope that God's grace will keep in the forefront of my mind his better way of instruction - a way that enfolds the imperfect with love and offers the struggling child a better way. This way is love that extends a helping hand and a gentle whisper, "This is the way... walk in it." (Isaiah 30:21) Because whatever else they or I may be, we are never unloved.
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